In a parallel universe where things actually turn out how you plan today would have been my wedding day. As days go it would have been quite nice, a mild sunny morning a thunderstorm that lasted just long enough for the church service to take place and a warm, dry afternoon with a cool breeze. I figure it has been pretty much how I imagined it, well without the white dress, church, guests, reception and I do bits.
Tomorrow it will be another day, the wedding that never was will be the past and I will move on. Saying that, there is no denying the impact someone no longer wanting to marry you has on your life; it leaves a mark on your soul and a dent in your heart. Realising the life you though you had wasn't real, that things you thought you shared were only in your mind takes some getting your head around, but you manage, you find new things to believe in; yourself and your ability to be who you want without relying on anyone else.
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